Sherman Koch, Megan McBride and I pull a prank on my sister while she is off on a week long ski trip.
I'm a dick, plain and simple. When I heard my Mom, Dad, Brother and Sister were all headed out of town on a week long ski trip, I wanted to do something that would make them think twice before leaving me without somebody to cook me meals and carry me to the bathroom. Original plan was to move everything from sister's room into my brother's room, and vice versa. Then I remembered that I'm lazy so I wanted to do something that would require lots of sitting arround. I remembered a GBS thread from a while back where some dood got his whole apartment foiled. The thread got like 5 replies but the idea stuck. I decided that seemed fun, and was very dickish to boot. I discussed the plan with my friend Sherman, and he was up for some sitting arround too. We went to Costco and bought $80 worth of foil. We waited for them to leave, and then headed into what I imagine a vagina would be like if it was a big room that someone had to live in. Also maybe with the presence of a few dehumidifiers.
We decided that we would wrap everything we could in foil. Not just cover the furniture and make the room shiney, but really just go into super asshole mode with the foil. Everything would be wrapped. everything in the drawers, the drawers, even the music. haha get it, i'm implying we listened to Rap or hip-hop (we didnt we listened to bowie and then some other crap that sucked because sherman sucks at liking good music)
01: My friend and I survey the challenge, this is a desk for pencils and learning crap.
02: Sherman is doing something to his mouth while I take a picture. oh look, foil, what a coincidence!
03: my sister has a lot of pictures because she's retarded.
04: her dresser is filled with stupid girly stuff like some gay fountain and a lava lamp. hey wait a minute that's mine
05: she has an autograph from some weird old guy with a hat. i think she fucked him or something.
06: God i hope i dont find anything disgusting like a tampon or a diary or some of those little hair scrunchies that still have hair in them
07: The wrapping begins. I shit you not this is the first thing i pull out of the drawer to wrap. mother fuckin "flashy foil."
08: dum de dum makin some progress on the drawers.
09: My side is prettier
Somewhere arround right here we decide to get alcohol. Just thought that was a detail worth mentioning for later on
10: Even something as insignificant as a rubber band cannot escape the wrath of sherman the masked foiler.
11: I left the pink fuzzy stuff out as some sort of lame civil disobediance or some shit... I dont know I'm a Rec major not a philosophy or art major, I don't think about this crap.
12: He looks confused for some reason maybe I asked him a really difficult question! HAHAHA! actually he just has a neck disease and I feel bad for implying he was stupid instead of just some mutated freak
13: Shit yea, Sherman's drawers on the desk are done and it is lookin mighty fine. he wrapped a lot of pencils individually and then wrapped them together.
Sherman decides to go home and i go driving arround on the freeway in a drunken haze.
My friend Megan comes over (it's a girl) and me and sherman decide we can take the day off and just boss the girl arround. but we didn't because we didnt want her to get to do all that sitting arround herself
All that is done is the desk, and we decide that our new strategy should be to wrap stuff in foil faster. And also to make Megan do most of the work while we pretend to not look at her boobs.
14: Haha my mask is on crooked! SURPRISE! Bet you didn't expect that. girls like to take pictures with cameras because it's the closest they can come to stealing your soul without the full moon or whatever the shit.
15: he's not even mexican but he looks it
16: Megan did all this work, if that's what you call "wrapping crap in foil"... its pretty easy even a moron could do it i bet.
17: I did this whole dresser thing by myself in the time it took Megan to do that stupid bulletin board and Sherman to do.... uh, whatever he did.
18: oh I guess that's what he did. No wait i did that too. I bet drinking out of those shot glasses is fun because people will think you are drinking metal .
19: this is a tea set. basically you're supposed to oo and ahh and my foil wrapping dedication and skill.
We all three pass out naked on the floor after writhing arround in the foil, letting it massage our soft lotion covered bodies.
A good chunk of the room is done now, but Sherman went home all pissy after my other stupid sister told him UFO's werent real during that Peter Jennings special, and megan was busy being a sperm recepticle for her boyfriend or something like that i assume, so i had to go it alone.
HAHA MAKE MASTURBATION JOKES YOU STUPID GBS FUCKS I'LL KILL YOU I SWARE
20: first thing i do is that corner with the stereo so just in case Sherman comes back over he cant make me listen to crappy music. that duck thing was already wrapped up, i think maybe that's what sherman did when me and megan were working yesterday.
21: oh yea these god damn fairies are everywhere all over the god damn walls. hello new desktop background.
22: bla bla bla i am tired and foiling like mother fucking crazy and forget to take pictures. deal with it. we start our tour of the final room. I covered up those stupid fairies with pictures of robots. FUCKING ROBOTS. if they fauxtest something i swear to god i'll burn this house down.
23: this is what it looks like when you first walk in. also this is what it looks like if you are walking out backwards.
24: when she comes home she's gonna want to crawl into bed but she cant because it'll be like crawling into the jaws of a giant metal dog with a really soft metal tounge. i'm awesome at analogies i got like a 600 on the analogy part of the SATs
25:my favorite part is the chair, it looks like a throne i'm probably gonna do that with my computer chair because i have low self esteem. hey did you notice how i stopped capping my I's? cause i did.
26: this corner is gross because it has a stupid ass hampster that ran in his wheel the entire time i was in there. I didn't wrap him but i wanted to so bad but then i thought maybe girls would see this and think i was mean (i am, sup )
27: that is a baby robot covering up a stupid fairie. also i guess those are some pictures or something, i dont know megan did this section.
So that's basically it. I think i have more pictures but i'm really tired because i HAD TO DO EVERYTHING BY MYSELF TONIGHT SHERMAN YOU JERKFACE!!!
My family gets home today sometime, i think this evening. I will record a video walk through just for fun, and then hopefully maybe my sister's screams/threats and maybe my impending eviction.
we only opened 3 of the things of foil, and only because there was three of us and we didnt want to share. I didn't finish off any of the rolls, and i'm pretty sure i'd still have like 1.5 left if we hadnt opened that third one, so i estimate this cost about a total of $40 dollars to do, and a billion hours. Also probably a few grand for my eye surgery because i thought it'd be funny to go into that room and shine a laser arround. foil is reflective kids! also i was kidding about that foreshadowing bit with the alcohol, hope you werent waiting for something to happen...
Yup so that's that. oh my sister is 17 so if anybody makes any cracks about her i'm legally justified in shooting you. also i have no idea how my bandwidth will hold up, so i hope nobody reads this thread
©2003-2008 Brian B. Griffiths